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The Idealizing, Devaluing and Discarding of Jesus — 249 Comments

  1. Happy New Year, Sky, and to everyone!

    2014 has been “a year” for nearly everyone I know. The challenges have been emotional, medical, legal, and financial, and these things don’t have to bury me or define me.

    May 2015 bring a new-found sense of courage, resolve, empowerment, and confidence to everyone who is in doubt, fear, and need.

    Brightest blessings!!!!

  2. I just stopped by to wish all of you a great year, ahead and I want to thank you for the support I received, here, in the past year. Happy New Year !


  3. Actually, your theory of Jesus as an enabler works very well into my theory that God was giant narcissist! LOL

    As I can attest, growing up with a narcissist/sociopath parent combo, being an enabler is a possible result. (and from internet surfing, seems somewhat common… also btw, I am not Jesus, just also an enabler)

    • Hi duped2012,
      This article was actually written by Jill and she is an atheist, who doesn’t believe that God exists. It’s a different way of perceiving the world, a perspective which I respect.

      Personally, I do believe in God.

      God, by definition, (if you believe that God actually exists) is an omnipotent creator who sees all, knows all (past, present and future) and created all of us.So the difference between a narcissist and God is that a narcissist should have humility because they are not omnipotent. They exist in this plane temporarily, as we all do and none of us know the future or the long-term consequence of our actions.

      The ex-spath once told me, “my friends think that you are arrogant.”

      Now I know that he was projecting and his statement had nothing to do with me. But at the time, I was confused because I didn’t know why he would say that. I actually had to look up the definition of “arrogant”. Then we went to a movie theatre and I mentioned what he said to the ticket counter person. She replied, “it’s not arrogance if you really are as good as you think you are.”

      In the same way, a narcissist is someone who thinks they are god-like. But it’s not narcissism if you really are God. If it seems like God is enabling, it’s only because he has something in mind that we cannot perceive, since we are not omnipotent.

    • Duped2012, welcome to 180rule.com. I have my personal views on organized religion, and those are personal to me.

      Assigning human attributes to “God,” “Jehovah,” “Great Creator,” or any other deity is simply unrealistic. It’s like assigning the attributes of a coconut to a hummingbird – they are not of the same species, and one will never “know” the other.

      As far as Divine Intervention goes with my experiences, there has been plenty and often not the type that anyone would consider “Divine,” by any stretch of the imagination. I don’t believe that we can ever truly understand ANY concept of Intelligent Design because we do not live in that Universe. Just as we cannot ever, ever “know” what it’s like to live in the Spath Universe, we can only guess, surmise, and theorize.

      Just my 2 cents………..LOL

  4. Duped, welcome to E A…it’s like AA except it is for ENABLERS who are trying to quit. LOL Yeppers, coming from a dysfunctional family does tend to help us become better enablers, but I’m not sure it isn’t in the genes like psychopathy is. Genes plus environment…but anyway, welcome to our little corner of the world.

    I agree with Sky that if you ARE God it isn’t narcissistic to think you are, but unfortunately too many Psychopaths just THINK they are God and try to play God with our lives. Sometimes our VERY lives.

    A woman recently was on the front page of the largest sunday paper in my state. Her law enforcement husband that she was leaving ran over her drunk in his car, REPEATEDLY trying to kill her. she spent a year in an ICU and now lives in hiding because he got GET THIS!!! THREE MONTHS IN THE COUNTY LOCK UP, but he did lose his job and sued her for spousal support becuse it was HER FAULT HE LOST HIS JOB. LOL If that ain’t an N and a P I’ll eat this computer without ketchup! The examples are endless and you know if we escape with our lives we are more fortunate than many.

    • Oxy,
      that’s unbelievable — and yet, typical for a spath. That’s why I have a hard time recommending that people get restraining orders from their spaths. The spath already expects this and is ready to use it against the victim. An ex-spouse will say that the restraining order caused them to lose their job and then they can’t pay alimony. Or, they will simply send their minions to do their dirty work and now they have an alibi for why they aren’t guilty of harassment. After all they weren’t anywhere near the victim, right?

      Recently, a law enforcement spath who is divorcing his wife, sent an item to her home just so that he could demand it back. He emailed her and he contacted her friends but she gray rocked him. Then he started sending his law enforcement minions to her house. He never showed up himself, even though she didn’t file a restraining order against him. It seems to me that he had already planned his strategy and even though she didn’t respond “correctly” by filing a restraining order, he isn’t able to deviate from his plan, so he is sending the substitute minions anyway.

      • Sky, what is unbelievable to me is how such behaviors are just viewed as an irritant rather than live-threatening or lethal crimes. The ***intent*** is the same, across the boards: to murder, or murder by proxy. If the target isn’t killed, outright, then the stress, anxiety, and constant hypervigilance will surely kill them.

        The point of filing for a restraining order isn’t with the ***hope*** that the spath will recognize the boundary and respect and accept it. It is a legal document that is supposed to seal their proverbial fates if they continue their reigns of terror. Sadly……….so, so sadly………..this is simply not the case.

        And, as a movie recommendation ONLY for those who have really managed their triggers: “Crazy Love.” If you choose to watch this movie, be advised that it could be extremely triggering, on every level. In short, it describes the story of Linda Pugach and her decades of experiences of stalking. And, nothing was ever really done. The outcome is so outrageous that it almost made me vomit, literally. SO…….good example of “CRAZY” and tough viewing for people in recovery.

  5. Hi Oxy,
    Your “EA” made me laugh. As difficult as it is to admit it, us enablers will probably always be in recovery. It’s a constant struggle to not accept responsibilities. I’m afraid I fail more often than not! Still, as you said, we did make it out alive, so at least we have SOME boundaries.

  6. Glad you guys like the EA…yep, it is difficult not to relapse and I think that we need to support each other. Recently a friend of mine, former wife of a psychopath, had been helping her 23 year old son. But he is now acting disrespectful to her, though living in her home, working, but spending every dime on “toys” and “joys” and saving nothing.

    She loves her son, like I loved mine, but I advised her to set some STRICT boundaries about him saving some money to get an apartment of his own…I don’t know yet if she has done so, but while she won’t take sheet from anyone but h er son, I was the same way…but there comes a point when you have to say “this is it” and rather than throwing him out on his ear in a fit of anger, I think if she would set some boundaries NOW and make him save for his own apartment over a reasonable period of time, he might be angry about it, but if he is not willing to do so, THERE’S THE DOOR.

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