In their book, Mistakes Were Made (but Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts, authors Carol Tarvis and Elliot Aronson define cognitive dissonance as “a state of tension that occurs whenever a person … Continue reading →
I stumbled onto this excellent article that I’d like to share, Anger: Attachment and Neurobiological Perspectives. It gives a thorough explanation of anger management styles and how they originate in attachment. I think many of us will find it a … Continue reading →
In this week’s sermon at my local church, the priest reminded us that the Pharisees disapproved of Jesus for eating with prostitutes and tax collectors. “Those” people were considered unclean and therefore contagious. It was dangerous to be in their … Continue reading →
Rene Girard’s book, Violence & the Sacred, describes rituals in primitive cultures that are eerily reminiscent of an experience with a psychopath. The cycles of “idealize, devalue and discard” familiar to those who have been in relationships with Cluster B … Continue reading →
A friend asked me this: What are the steps toward healing from an encounter with a psychopath? Validate that the abuse really happened. First, and most important is to be validated. An abuser understands that the abuse has more power … Continue reading →
The Shoes. One of my earliest memories is of learning to put on my own shoes. The first time I put on my black Mary Janes by myself, I proudly went to show my big brother. I was three and … Continue reading →
The Sabotage Have you ever had anyone plot to kill you, try to drive you to suicide through bullying or plan your financial ruin? It’s hard not to take those things personally. It certainly feels personal. The attack is maliciously … Continue reading →
We’ve all had the experience of waking from a dream that’s particularly disturbing. Nothing made sense, it wasn’t even real, yet we wake up emotionally rattled. There’s a nagging feeling that our mind is trying to reveal something important because … Continue reading →
The word psychopath is derived from the Greek words, psyche meaning “mind” or “soul” and path, meaning “sickness”. An encounter with a psychopath certainly leaves one feeling sickened. Scars from psychopathic encounters leave a person and community indelibly traumatized and … Continue reading →
I’ve recently learned something interesting about caterpillars. Inside the caterpillar body, there are clumps of cells called imaginal discs. These discs, which carry the butterfly DNA, are dormant for most of the caterpillar’s life. Once the caterpillar enters the pupa … Continue reading →
