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How Psychopaths Self-Sabotage. — 54 Comments

  1. STJ,
    It blows me away that they can’t just slime us and leave. They have to keep it up, continually terrorizing us. It’s like we are their addiction.
    Did you say you got a restraining order to get him to move his car?

    I had a year where my only emotion was terror but I didn’t even know why. I told several people, “I have this overwhelming sensation of being in danger. It’s like walking around with a gun to my head, but I don’t know why because I can see that there isn’t any danger.”

    It was my intuition. This was a few years before his mask slipped, but I must have been sensing that he was moving into a con. I think that when they are in predatory mode, we can “feel” it in our guts.

  2. yes Skylar

    Your’re right it is the feeling of being prey. I felt hunted and watched. My every move recorded. He even had my computer rigged up to scare me and in terror mode it did.

    I would have thought that this was my imagination at work–but I have to verify everthing. I found numerous instances on the net from women who advised getting their computers cleaned after one of these relationships. That they spy on everything you do.

    No wonder I was paranoid for ages.

    About the car. I asked him politly to move it. he said he paid road tax and could park were he wanted. After a year I told him I was going to see a lawyer. he moved it 100 yards down the road for the next three years. Lawyer told me he was within his rights to park where he wanted and that I could be viewed as an neurotic woman.

    He didn’t consider it stalking behaviour.

    But the good thing is about it–it verified my bizarre story. That I wasn’t crazy as he was–and it was him demonstrating crazy behaviours.

    So good came from bad.



  3. I can’t imagine being in contact with ex spath either. It would be so sickening I’m sure I wouldn’t survive it.

    I felt paramour for a long time too, and that started while being with the spath. After the nightmare ended I became worse, I became completely asocial and avoidant. Maybe it was some form of traumatic stress disorder, but not until I found out he was a sociopath did I start coming out of my hollow empty shell. I was dead inside, too, but healing has started to fill my life with purpose and direction.

    Good does come from bad. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. It took along time for me to surface too and get out and about. I had panic attacks and everything.

    It’s my birthday today and I am waiting on my daughter coming home from work. She says she has a big surprise for me. Wonder what it is:)


  5. STJ,

    MOST happy of birthdays to you! A birthday without a ppath sleeping next to you is a GOOD one.

    Sometimes I imagine lying next to the spath and I am so incredibly grateful for having woken the eff up. I remember lying next to him and being in a panic, and not being able to sleep a wink. Like the rest of you, before I knew about personality disorders I still KNEW something was wrong. But until you know, you really cannot imagine it…..

    Have a good day all,

  6. STJ, what a priceless gift from your daughter! Belated Happy Birthday to vous. My birthday is also in May. The lovliest month of all!

    Love & Prayers,

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